Wednesday 23 April 2014

The memories will wane, the aftershocks remain...

So clearly I am useless at this blogging thing, it's so difficult to write about the past so I've decided to write about the present and slip the past in as and when necessary.

I had an amazing bank holiday weekend down in Falmouth visiting my friend's children. It was comforting being in a room where having anxiety and depression was the norm, we all understood each other, no one thought my actions were strange or worrying because we were all in the same position... But now I'm back in Wolverhampton.

Into the final few weeks of my degree and work is hectic, stress levels are high, workload is high, anxiety is high. Mood is low, I'm not sleeping properly because an increase in anxiety and stress means I have an increased number of nightmares,  less sleep means higher stress and anxiety so it's a vicious circle.

I keep having flashbacks where I can see a girl, I can see her clearly but I can't place who she is... Every time I try to focus and work out who this girl is it makes me feel faint and nauseous. Whenever I see her I can't breathe and my body is frozen in fear... Maybe I should go back on meds?

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